I’ve been single for most of my adult life so I have mixed feelings about the whole dating thing – excitement that there might just be a perfect imperfect “soulmate” out there for me with perfect answers to my date questions that I stumble upon in the world in a meet-cute romantic comedy sort of way but also dread as I wade through all the “undesirables” and begin to think there isn’t really anyone out there on the same wavelength as me (and I ain’t settling).
It also gets so much more complicated dating as a Black woman in the States, as we having so very unique challenges to contend with in the dating world. Check out the (hilarious) podcast I co-host with one of my good friends – Happy Hour Husband Hunting – as we discuss just what those challenges are.
When I do go on dates, I think it’s really important to understand who the person is – and keep it entertaining and light so it doesn’t seem like a job interview. Vibin’ is important. Especially now during COVID-19 times when alot of dating hinges on virtual dates that really put the emphasis on talking and getting to know each other rather than the physical. Here are some things I would ask a date and hope I get some surprising answers:
- If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?
(Why: I’ve been to about 20 countries and I’m into people who are well traveled (= open-mindedness to other cultures IMO so this is important!)
- How would you describe yourself in three words?
(Why: Just how self-aware are they? Only the self-aware IMO can be a great relationship partner)
- What do you think was the best decade: 80s, 90s, 00s. And what was your very favorite things you wore in that decade?
(Why: Answer will be filed away so I can ask for pictures later)
- What are your top three favorite movies?
(Why: I’m REALLY into films [I call them “films” and not “movies” so that should tell you how much of a film snob I am]. Bonus points if they include an independent film. Negative a lot of points if they say something like Fast & the Furious)
- What’s the weirdest bit of trivia you know? (Why: I’m weirdly into random facts because I love pop culture trivia. Curious to know if they know more than me….)
- What is your idea of the perfect date?
(Why: Just how romantic are they? Also, did they plan this date in line with their perfect date?)
- If you could make one rule that everyone had to follow, what rule would you make?
(Why: This could go so many ways and be so funny lol)
What do you think? Would you ask any of these date questions?
I’m curious – answer one of the questions above yourself and let me know if you have any go-to date questions. I would love to use some of yours, lol.
[Photo credit: Still from the film If Beale Street Could Talk]